love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
