he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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