He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
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