I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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