We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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