Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
