Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
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