so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
