those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
well you can't waste a boner
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
vagina is talking i cant
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
