quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
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