Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Randomize