Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Randomize
