What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Randomize
