wat bout pragnant strippers??
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
