He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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