i always forget guys have bellybuttons
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
You ruined the universe
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