did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
