Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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