Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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