Michael Bay diarrhea
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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