Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
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She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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