how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
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As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
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I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I don't want my vagina anymore.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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