why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Barsexuality is the new black.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
