Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.