I love black thongs
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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