he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
