remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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