He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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