I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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