ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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