He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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