..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
