so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Randomize
