you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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