I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
