i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Congratulations! We have a period
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