he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
