Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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