It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
