he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
