and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
