Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
