The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
