We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
