after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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