He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Randomize
