In the future we'll all be gay
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
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