She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
