you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize