he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
