He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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