I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Randomize
